• Making assumptions is all about thinking. We think too much, and thinking leads to assumptions. Thinking “what if?” can create a huge drama in our lives. Everyone can think a lot, and thinking brings fear. We have no control over all this thought, all the symbols that we distort in our heads. If we stop thinking, we don`t try to explain ourselves anymore, and that prevents us from making assumptions. Look at the last two contributions on how they can apply the first and second agreement to friendship. Then come back and find out more about the third agreement. “We tend to make assumptions about everything. The problem with the hypothesis is that we think they are the truth. One could swear that they are real. We make assumptions about what others do or think – we take it personally – and we blame and react by sending emotional poison with our word. That is why we ask for problems every time we make assumptions.

    We assume that we misunderstand them, that we take them personally, and that we will end up creating a great drama for free. -Don Miguel Ruiz All the adness and drama you have lived in your life was rooted in making assumptions and taking things personally. Don Miguel Ruiz We can never completely protect ourselves from pain, neither self-inflicted nor caused by others. Nor can we live with the assumption that we will experience pain if we are visible and vulnerable with others. Making assumptions is simply an invitation to problems, especially in our own relationships. How many conflicts have erupted in families between children and parents, between men and women on the basis of assumptions? Our control heads want to know the answers all the time, so if you don`t have the facts at your fingertips, we let the chimpanzee out to fill the void. All this is based on huge assumptions and blindly follows the popular rhetoric of the day, without really understanding what is in the person`s heart or how they came to who they are. There are so many of us who walk around with iron masks and don`t want people to come near us in case they cause damage.

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